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Hey blog world. Sorry I haven’t been on here in a while. I know how much you guys have been patiently waiting for my next post, but you can finally breathe easy once more seeing as IT’S HERE! You’re welcome.

So for the thousands of you that don’t know me personally, you don’t know that my pal Norbert is at the shop getting all fixed up, and while he’s there I have to drive my brothers’ car (it has no name yet) which is probably the crappiest car ever. Oh waht’s that? You want to hear how Norbert got broken down and annihilated, well not annihilated, because he is fixable, but damaged (Do, do you have a first aid kit handy?), that was all because of my pal Alyssa (I would do a link to her blog, but that’s exceeds my word press knowledge, but she is the ONLY person in my blog roll).

You see, what had happened was we decided to go see that 3d Glee movies, because we are both Gleeks and who wouldn’t want to see that movie, but there was dilemma. The movie only ran two weeks, and we were going to go the last day it played everywhere, and seeing as we both had things to do during the day, we decided it would be best to go at night. 10:15 to be exact. Oh, also, the theatre was like an hour away, did I mention how badly we wanted to see this movie? So I leave at 9 to go to this lady’s house, and imma let you know that getting to her house is an adventure all on its own, but regardless after a bunch of text slash call directions I get there. This is about at 9:45, so when she gets in the car to tell me it’s like 35 minutes from her house I was about to die. I was not going to miss any part of this movie.

If this doesn't appeal to you, how are you reading this blog?

I speed down the highway almost killing us about 3 times, and there may have been a fight about to commence between a couple of cars, but I think they were just friends. Anyway, we drive all the way out to SUGARLAND, and get turned around by this invisible movie theater, which isn’t really invisible, it’s just hard to find, then we finally find it after asking some creepy cop. But before we can get there my pal Norbert stalls. and we both are thinking that Jesus didn’t want us to see this movie because it was already 10:20 ish, but I wasn’t gonna let anyone get in the way of me seeing this movie, so I’m like “Please Jesus, let me just see the epicness that is this movie.” So Albert pushes his little 14 year old self, and we get there after stalling out about 4 more times, once at a stop sign mid way turn, but we park and run into to get our tickets, and make it as the opening credits roll and the first song “Don’t Stop Believing” is going. I was happy.

The movie was pretty awesome, not gonna lie, the cricket chirping along throughout all of it, pretty annoying. Rachel was by far the best, but I could be biased because she is going to be my wife one day. Anyway, we leave the theater singing our own rendition of  “Valerie”, then get back in Albert praying he has rested enough to be able to get us home, and when he reverses, I thought we were home free, but then he didn’t feel like driving, he just stalled out instead. We laughed at first, but after walking to Kroger and back to get Anti freeze (I thought it was because he didn’t have enough coolant), and that still not working, it got a bit annoying. Thankfully, Alyssa’s parents were able to come get us, and then she was able to take me home. But then when I got home, the fridge decided to break, and that’s when I decided to go ahead and go to bed before the world around me decided to break.

Well a couple days later school started, and I have to drive a freaking jeep that gets 14 miles per gallon, which I had to fill up because my padre believes it is me that is using the gas, and I felt like replying with a good old “Don’t make me snap my fingers”, but decided against it since he was paying for the car repairs, and just agreed, but agreed with attitude.

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For those of you who are not college kids or live in a cave where the sun only hits you once every millenium this past week was Spring Break for a bunch of Texas colleges and instead of going to party like a majority of my peers (hello college vocabulary), I dcided to go to a magical place called “Playa Elsenbrock” (“Elsenbrock Beach” for all you non Spanish speakers out there). My Aunt Nita decided to name her backyard that after I relieved a substantial amount of sun so when anybody asks how I got so tan, I would just say “Oh I went to Playa Elsenbrock!”

The whole reason I was at her house this Springs Breaks was to help my Uncle Don build a shed. I decided it would be a good way for me to get in touch with my MANLY side and build something with my hands that didn’t involve Legos or building blocks plus they was paying me. It turned out to be a pretty amazing Spring Break. I mean there were sometimes (a lot of times) where I was about to pretend to hurt myself so I could get out of it, but then I thought, “Robin wouldn’t do that.” So I decided to stick it out.

Even though my uncle didn’t want to admit it, I’m pretty sure I was the best “apprentice” ever. I mean, I was constantly keeping him entertained with my singing and dancing. He was surprised I hadn’t been discovered yet. I would constantly express my feelings in song, and change the lyrics to other songs to fit what I was doing, such as Justin Timberlake’s “Senorita” became my own “Mrs. Juanita.” and I didn’t just stick to main stream pop, I did some Broadway as well. The song “Macavity” from teh musical Cats became “Mah Crackity”. The song referred to the constant falling of my pants revealing my booty crack, and everyone knows that “there’s nothing like Mah Crackity!”

I mean honestly I learned a lot, and I feel more manly then I ever have in my life (even more then when I got my first wand). So I’ve decided to become a Renaissance man and do it all: Build, Sing, Dance, Act, and Accounting. Now all I need is to find a place that sells man cards…..then find someone to punch a hole in it because I don’t have a hole puncher…

“Harry who…..?”

This is the response I got when I brought up Harry Potter to one of my friends during class. I felt like yelling “WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE LAST DECADE?” but decided against it, because I didn’t think my Accounting Professor would be too happy with me. I guess some of you BILLION readers out there don’t know that I am the biggest Harry Potter fan out there. Thats right, I said. I will fight (or in this case wizard duel) anyone to the death for this title! I know some of you readers are like, actually I am, but you’re WRONG! That means you Nicole, sorry, but you aint got SHIT on me! You may still have a fixed wand, but that’s because you aren’t practicing your dueling skills three nights a week like me.

Also, I have proof that my knowledge is topped, because I am one of 7 people that has gotten 100% on the Scholastic’s Harry Potter quiz. It covers all the books, and is 84 questions. You can break it up into a 12 question book per quiz, but only pansies do that. Another exhibit of my Harry Potter knowledge is an epic game of Harry Potter Scene It that was played in teams of two (big mistake by the way), and was played about 2 Christmas’ ago. I was teamed up with my boo Alyssa, and though she is indeed my boo, she is to never be on my team of a Harry Potter related trivia game ever again…..EVER! All the other teams were able to go about one fifth of the board with out stopping, but when it came to me, I was like “Sorcerer’s Stone. Hermione. Draught of the living death. Green.” and then when we got My Plays or All Plays, I would be able to call that shit before the question was asked, especially the “What spell is this” one. They would show a scene from a movie where one of the characters would use a spell, and I was able to call that shit before a word was said. Unfortunately, we (Alyssa) rolled (her only job) a muggle question (she sucked at her job), which is a question that had nothing to do with any of the Harry Potter books, but the muggles in the moving. I don’t remember the question, but the answer was Big Bend or something like that, and my boo Alyssa has a bunch of useless information in her brain, so the only question I turn to her for help, she doesn’t know, which then cost us the game. Sad day…..

Seriously though, I wanted to punch this girl in her face, and I don’t hit girls. I feel like even people who don’t like Harry Potter still acknowledge that it’s a huge phenomenon, way better then that Twilight crap. Sorry to all the 500 million girls, and boys, that are in love with Edward and Jacob, but the directors of Harry Potter saw those Twilight movies coming, and to show that they are way better then those loser vampires, they cast who they knew would be the lead vamp in the movies, as a dying character. GENIUS!

Back to the girl though, she looked like a straight up idiot in front of the entire class, and even our professor looked shocked. By saying that one comment, she proved that she was either some troll that had been living under a bridge with a rock as a pet, or someone who had been in a coma for the past 13 years, and has just woken up. Even those two excuses don’t sound viable.  I will just have to shrug it off though, because luckily the first part of the last book’s movie is coming out in 2 days, and I’m pretty pumped.

In other news, I really liked last nights episode of Glee.

I will now leave you with a quote from last Saturday’s SNL which reminds me of that girl every time I think of that bimbo. “You got champagne taste, and an ASS face!”

So, I am a huge Glee fan, for instance: I read what the plot and songs are gonna be for the upcoming episodes, and any other person on this planet knows that this past weeks episode of Glee contained songs from Britney Spears. Now when I was growing up, I was a semi-fan, but now not so much, I mean I could care less about her. Anyway, as I had class at the time of the episode I skipped it…class, and watched the goddess that is Heather Morris. I feel like “I’m in Love With a Stripper” is a perfect song to describe my feelings for this woman. I mean she is so hot she turned half of the straight population of straight woman into lesbians, only her and Jennifer Aniston can do that. So her and this other girl on the show did a cover of “Me Against the Music” and it was 50 times better then Britney’s. That and their version of “Toxic” were my favorite dancey numbers, while Lea Michele’s “The Only Exception” was my favorite number overall. Her voice is how Heather Morris looks, AMAZING! (Notice the caps). So at mid night when my friend had gotten off of work, I went over to her house to watch it with her cuz she hadn’t seen it at this point, and she thought I went to class and hadn’t either. SUCKA!

So last week after the first episode of Season 2, me and her with another of our friends danced to one of the glee songs that week, “Empire State of Mind”, and it was beautiful. This week our friend ditched us for studying…with Asians, but we thought despite her stupidness we should make a video anyways. So we chose “Me Against the Music”, and we made an effort to learn some of the moves that they were doing in the show, but my friend gave up so we decided to just film it. I still attempted to do what they did in the show which was a lot of hair flipping, and I haven’t had my haircut since March so it is pretty long. As my hair was flipping along to the song I noticed how amazing this feeling was. I was pretty sure that by continually shaking my hair, I was looking cooler and cooler by the second. Unfortunately though, when we played it back, it looked like I was just having a huge neck spasm, so we shot it again. This time I controlled my hur, and it was a pretty decent attempt. By this time it was 4 in da mornin, and we both ahd to get up early for class so we called it quits.

On my way home though, I played that song over and over, and lowered my window so my hur was even more out of control and as I was dancing slash shaking my hur I noticed a couple people stare, especially when I was at red lights, but I didn’t care, cuz it was the best feeling in the world. Anyway, I got home and jumped into my shower, if any of you guys need a mental picture think Mexican Harry Potter, and played my jam. Now, I did not think this next part through which isn’t normal for me, but in the glee version dance, they spin a lot, so as I was in the shower singin and dancin and hur flippin, I decided to do one of the turns. It resulted in me losing my balance and banging my head against the towel bar in my shower.

It pretty bad, but not bad enough for me to stop head banging in the shower.

I’m horrible at writing, like straight up horrible. So why am I typing up this blog? Hopefully to prevent any more of my hair from falling out (I’ll get to it). But if you expect this to be written like someone who has amazing grammar and punctuation, well then let me apologize for this 10 seconds that you have wasted on reading this, and I suggest you click on that back button and leave this web page. I’ll wait until your done………………………………….

OKAY! So here is the thing, I have decided that since I am in a junior in college, it is now my time to take on more responsibility and live on my own. That has not been working out for me so far. I am completely stressed, and I can tell, because I don’t stress like normal people. I get rashes, and not nice little ones, I’m talking red bumps that start from the wrist and wrap all the way up and cuts off right where my sleeve ends. Ironic, I know.

Also, it has come to my attention that my stress has been making my hair fall out. This is not okay in my book, because I don’t have normal hair. I have amazing chocolate love curls! I’m talking so good that people have asked me on more then one occasion if I was wearing a wig. Hair like this shouldn’t be waisted. And it isn’t falling out normally, it is falling out at a ridiculous rate.

For instance, the other day I was in the shower and I was rinsing my chocolate love curls, and when I went to get my shampoo, I looked at my hand and it was hairy enough to be Chewbacca’s! I pulled it off my hand and put it on the shower wall like a normal person would, and when I finally dried my self off and got out it had come to my attention that I had not gotten all of it. There was another bunch of it on the floor of the shower. And of course I had to get it out of there so it wouldn’t clog the drain. All together, the hair that had fallen off could’ve made a nice weave for some little girl who wanted luscious curls. Not really, it was more like a full head of baby hair, but still, my dad is balding, and I don’t wanna end up with his head of nappy hair.

Anyway, this blog is meant to get out the stress that I may accumulate over the year, because it apparently isn’t healthy to bottle it up. Now my situation isn’t crazy stressful, but I usually tend to take things over the top. I am just not comfortable knowing that I don’t have enough money to finance the apartment I am in, so of course a job is the way to go, but I am also trying not to get kicked out of the business school at UTSA, and prove to almost my entire family that I am able to do all of this on my own, while they are sure that I will fail and be back in December.

This is gonna be an exciting year…..